Shredding scissors
Posted by Richard on April 24, 2008
An ad insert in yesterday's paper made me laugh out loud. This has to be one of the dumbest products I've seen in ages. It looks like something you'd see in a Saturday Night Live parody commercial. A quick Google search determined that the Shredding Scissors have been around for a couple of years, and they've come down in price from around $17 to $8 ($6 in quantity).
But glowing ad copy can't make this product idea any less silly:
The Shredder Scissor is the most convenient and compact way to get rid of those expired coupons, unwanted papers and confidential paper documents. At first glance it's just a pair of scissors, but with further exploration you will see that you can shred documents, or just parts of documents, without any electric or battery-operated power. Being the cheapest shredding option around it is amazing to think that it also has a long life and is small enough to be transported easily from the home to the office or classroom. The shredder's potential does not stop there, it may also be the perfect instrument for your next arts and crafts endeavor, making customized confetti or even to cut Nori to top your favorite dish of sushi!
…Not a Toy. Keep away from childrens.
If you feel compelled to shred expired coupons, I suggest you seek professional counseling.
I suppose if the term "customized confetti" actually makes sense to you, you might get all excited about how artsy-craftsy you could be with a pair of these.
And if you pride yourself in how green you are, you might feel smugly self-satisfied as you shredded documents "off the grid." At least until your hand started to cramp up.
Personally, I like having a large carbon footprint, and I use an electric shredder. Mine is about 6 or 8 years old and cost me, IIRC, $20 or $25 on sale. If it needed replacing, I'd probably run down to Office Depot and get one of these.
jed said
Hey, that’s the shredder I have. Good buy on the sale price, for sure.
Of course, if you really want to be carbon consumptive, you could followup the shredding by burning the pieces with a propane torch. Which would be more secure as well.
rgcombs said
Do you mean the scissors or the one at Office Depot? Do you shred your expired coupons?
As for the shreds, douse them with charcoal lighter fluid and toss a match on them. The “whoosh” is a whole lot of fun, if you don’t lose your eyebrows from being too close. 🙂